REAL:
Batman,
a.k.a. Bruce Wayne
|
HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD:
Batman,
a.k.a. Maxwell Allen
|
REAL:
The Hulk, a.k.a. Dr.
Bruce Banner
|
HOLLYWOOD
BOULEVARD:
The
Hulk,
a.k.a. Joe
McQueen
|
| After Bruce Wayne's
parents are murdered before his
eyes, he vows vengeance on
criminals of all kinds. Luckily,
he's inherited a fortune, which he
uses to fund his crime-fighting
persona and to buy a lot of
tuxedos. |
Maxwell Allen, who
attends therapy sessions in full
costume, reveals that before he
came to Hollywood, he used to work
as a bodyguard for guys with
"really long Italian last names."
He was also, he says, involved in
gladiator fighting and money
collecting. "I've unfortunately
left a body count," he remorsefully
tells his therapist. |
Dr. Bruce Banner is a
scientist trying to create a
powerful weapon for the U.S.
military. But his gamma-bomb
experiment goes wrong, sentencing
him to a life of permanent split
personality - as himself in moments
of calm and as the Hulk, a monster,
in moments of extreme anger. Like
whenever he watches The View. |
Joe McQueen became the
Hulk in a moment of extreme need.
McQueen had sold his Super Nintendo
and bought a bus ticket to L.A.,
but he arrived with no money and no
work. So he spent four years living
in the Hollywood Hills. Not in a
good way: He was homeless. Then he
bought his Hulk costume and
transformed himself into a
Hollywood Boulevard hero. "To me,
it was a different way of
panhandling," McQueen says in
Confessions. |
| To take out law
breakers by any means necessary.
Early Batman even used handguns,
and he didn't mind leaving a body
count of his own. Later Batman,
especially as played by Adam West
in the campy '60s TV show, was less
inclined to murder. Although that
Batman had no issues with vronk,
splat, and kapow! |
To become famous.
Unfortunately, that's not working
out, Allen says. He explains that
because he looks something like
George Clooney, he is often shooed
away from projects. But it's not
all bad. "My wife is kind of proud
of the fact she can tell people
she's married to Batman," he says
in Confessions. "And she likes the
fact that I look like George
Clooney." |
To find a cure for the
ailment that causes him to become a
giant green being with serious
anger-management issues. At least,
that's Banner's cause. For Hulk,
the cause is to smash. |
To become famous. "To
be an actor - that's what I want,"
says McQueen, who does go on to
land a small role in Finishing the
Game, a parody of 1970s kung fu
movies. "I'm out here seriously
trying to make a name for myself. I
didn't come out here to get in a
costume and stand on Hollywood
Boulevard and make chump
change." |