President Bush and French President Jacques Chirac discussed the future of relations between the two countries over Martin’s handmade gourmet pretzels, “the Rolls Royce of the pretzel world,” according to the New York Times.

Highbrow magazines could have even more difficulty. Consider an article in the history and science magazine Smithsonian, called, say, “Contemplating Einstein”:

The father of modern physics ran a hand through his shock of unruly hair, which, as it happens, might have been tamed into a suave Sinatra-esque ’do if only he had invented something truly useful, like Extra-Body Daily Shampoo and Super Clean Sculpting Gel. Alas, these would be conceived by follicle wunderkind Paul Mitchell.

So, okay, there are a few LAY’S brand POTATO CHIPS problems to be worked out with product placement in SPRITE magazines. But they are CHEVY TRUCK small.

Me? I don’t see what all the McDONALD’S NIKE GILLETTE LISTERINE CADILLAC GOODYEAR NORELCO VERIZON CANON SONY CRAFTSMAN AMERICAN AIRLINES fuss is about.