THE SHIRT OFF HER BACK

I had an appointment with a gentleman at one of the Las Vegas casinos. I was to call him when I got to the lobby so he could come down to meet me. When I did, he asked me how he’d recognize me once he got there. I told him what kind of top I was wearing, and without missing a beat, he said, “Take it off and I’ll recognize you immediately!”
— Linda Downing, Beaver, Oklahoma

All Shook Up

My first international trip was 20 years ago, to Tokyo. I knew nothing of the Japanese, and I thought they were wonderful hosts for providing me with a vibrating bed. I later discovered it was actually an earthquake!
— Stephen Tolbert,
Miami Springs, Florida