Seems Like Old Times Didn't see that one coming, did you? But this Neil Simon script offers so many possibilities, it deserves its own story. First of all, there are the two lines you repeat in a Spanish accent, a la Aurora, the maid: "I didn't ask and she didn't say," and the always gold, "She's not out in the back eating chicken, that's for sure." Then there are the Chevy Chase lines, everything from the one you use when someone says something unintelligible or stupid ("Well said, well spoken, B.G.") to the one I break out at least once a week, when someone does absolutely nothing to help solve a problem ("Well, you've done everything humanly possible.").

Arthur So fun because you get to deliver all of them in a British accent, since it works for either Dudley Moore's or Sir John Gielgud's characters. Lines like "Bathing is a very lonely business" and "If I begin to die, please take this off my head." I also like the "Where's the rest of this moose?" zinger, but if you can work that one into the conversation, then you don't really need my help at this.

Ocean's Eleven Most films need years to a) see if the humor holds up to multiple viewings, and b) work their way into the pop-culture ethos so that there's at least a scintilla of a chance your joke will be recognized and appreciated. Steven Soderbergh's 2001 version has quickly become an instant classic, though, packed with lines that give you a cribbed feeling of understated cool. Memorize this movie, and you'll be surprised how many times you can use excerpts like "If I'm reading this right … and I like to think that I am"; "Denim like a jean"; "This is the best part of my day"; and the one even my wife uses, often at the grocery store when we're selecting wine, "You think we need one more? You think we need one more. All right, we'll get one more."